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Me: The sad thing about my childhood is that I haven't had a friend who was willing to strictly play Fireboy and Watergirl with me in a long, long time
Wiley: Mood
Me:
Me: Idk what that entails but I feel like you wouldn't want to play with me anyways lol
-Galaxian-
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That friend was a prime example of why I make characters who show how sad it is when people who would've been nice were raised in less than ideal conditions and became disgusting human beings
I pity who he would've been
-Galaxian-
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Younger me lowkey had bad friend preferences
Actually, it was more like "the lowest bar was too low"
I had many good friends lol I'm not about to sink all of their ships
-Galaxian-
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My childhood 'traumas' mostly come in the form of "why did certain adults find it pertinent to bully a tiny little kiddo who didn't do them wrong as a method of...'coping'??????"
Moral trauma, not too much mental trauma, though I'll say my personality drastically changed from said moral experiences lol. Good for me, young me was naive and dumber than present me so I call that a win instead. Morally though, sometimes I wish I could be dumber
Rai is actually morally more innocent than me. I hope he doesn't have to go through moral trauma (: .
-Galaxian-
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Okay for some reason I thought being able to hold a plank for "only" 8 minutes was bad idk
Now Wiley's laughing at me because apparently the typical dude only does it for like 2 or 3 minutes
,,,,,,
-Galaxian-
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Notice of sorts?
I'm not gonna be able to respond to roleplaying threads until Friday at the earliest. Sorry for the inconvenience
-Galaxian-
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For some reason Rai drily going "What a poet" is cracking me up and I dunno why
-Galaxian-
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The general pattern I'm seeing for my characters is the ones who look drab in the anime style look like fashion models in a more realistic one, where the ones who look really pretty in the anime style actually look more drab in the more realistic one
Huh.
Maybe it's because Hitan can't be as shiny in a realistic style, but at least he's cute xD squishable cheeks
-Galaxian-
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My mind is wondering how an ability would work where someone's speed is determined by them pinpointing a center of gravity and then gravitational force in a certain direction and then they make themselves "fall" in that direction
For some reason part of my mind thinks this is actually a good idea.
I mean, it's funny, of course, if one visualizes it, but like, straight-line moving everywhere...huh.
-Galaxian-
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Imagine if they spun while "falling" too
That sounds like a nightmare.
Also Nagesh why are you laughing like that
-Galaxian-
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Oh turns out some ads aren't so useless
Learned something new ig
Of course I will now take this new knowledge and skew it to make it as angsty as possible before making it also as vague as possible so no one gets it
-Galaxian-
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Rai and Wiley would be so screwed if they were in the real world.
I'm saying that because this year I've experienced many days where it feels like eating's just a waste of time, and while I ultimately did eat, it felt horrible.
They both kinda regard eating as a waste of time too, but hopefully CC!Wiley also recognizes his need to eat. I mean, at the essence, even GGaD!Wiley recognizes it too (and so does GGaD!Rai), it's just not so apparent and thus kind of concerning.
-Galaxian-
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I'm just imagining a hallway with a closed door at the end. Rai opens the door slightly and walks out calmly. After a while, the door opens again. Raez opens the door and struts out calmly. And then a while passes again, before the door opens and a blurred silhouette runs out while screaming
Probably the end of a haunted house or smthn idk
-Galaxian-
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Wiley: I relate to the mewling despair of bathing cats
Me: what,,, what is that supposed to mean exactly
-Galaxian-
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GalaxianExplosion wrote:
Wiley: I relate to the mewling despair of bathing cats
Me: what,,, what is that supposed to mean exactly
-Galaxian-
isn't Wiley the one who screams when he touches warm/hot water?
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Wiley's the one who screams
-Galaxian-
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Raez's legs fell asleep and he didn't realize
He stood up and fell and I laughed at him
Wiley then tried to intimidate me into not laughing but the only intimidating part of him is his hair dye
Also how blue his eyes are ig but I'm not sure if that counts
-Galaxian-
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I read "Go to a bank" as "Go rob a bank" from a Pinterest picture and I have rarely been so alarmed
-Galaxian-
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I may or may not have imagined Wiley actually being forced into insanity and screaming out of genuine madness and cried lol
The man's crazy and messes up my thought process a lot, but still he doesn't deserve insanity or anything like that. I actually designed some parts of him as a defense in case future me ever decides to yield to heartless impulses like that in terms of executing plot
Thankfully, it's much harder to break him mentally than other characters (kinda surprising to an extent, maybe? I'm not sure), but still the thought makes me so sad lol
-Galaxian-
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I guess this is more of a rant that should be on my homethread but it somewhat relates to roleplaying, so yeah.
(By the way I'm not sick, my mom's not sick, this is pertaining to someone else, so don't worry as much ig)
My interpretation of family is, in fact, not as callous as my actual speech and actions regarding family (outside of my mom) is. But my speech and actions regarding it are so callous due to reality.
There is nothing more sad--well, okay, not to talk in absolutes is a good tip, so I'll say there's almost nothing more sad--than someone being sick and not telling family members about it. The sad part is because the reason for that is: Those family members don't care. Why tell them then? Maybe they might even wish you dead. And in China, that's inauspicious. Cursing someone to death and doing things like saying they're dead when they're alive is really, really bad.
As mentioned before, this isn't my own experience, so I can say I'm more credible now. If I were sick, yeah, basically only two family members in my entire gigantic family in China would even care remotely (one of which is the one who is sick now), so even if I were in China, it'd be the same situation. Why does it increase my 'credibility'? Because that means without experiencing it myself, my view of the family is correct. Reality has proven that view. Then, that actually sick family member is in China, which means the arguments of "You aren't in China, so you're probably wrong! They don't care for you as much 'cause you haven't seen them (and vice versa) in a lot of years! You don't know them as well, maybe they do care!" is wrong. Which I expected, obviously, from the fact that I don't believe in that.
And maybe because I hate that sad reality so, so much, and wish that reality were kinder and warmer, that I rarely try to pinpoint huge sources of angst and trauma on genuine family. Family will always have its faults, and I accept that. But when family is as disjointed and horrible as I've sometimes seen, I don't really believe that the individuals coming from that family can have as complete a development as I would wish for them.
By the way, I know I'm a kid, and maybe a lil stupid, but I don't appreciate it when I spend hours looking at information relating to a condition when I should've been doing schoolwork/finals and then my advice is blown off/not even tried. What will it take for me to be listened to? Do I need to get a MD? Because we all know I'm a long ways off from that right now and might not even be smart enough in the first place to get one even many years from now.
-Galaxian-
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Me: (*says things with freaking statistics; again, said 'things' have been based off of research that I literally do not have the time to conduct, I have math and it's sucking out my soul*)
People (rn it's singular person) in China: ok but no
LISTEN JFSDFIOFJDOFISJ
Then again they don't listen to my mom either but like
If you aren't listening to me, listen to the facts behind what I am saying. I'm saying things in my nice tone, in the voice that suits my age and is supposed to be somewhat cute/beautiful, in a completely empathetic way that means I need to use extra effort in sounding nice and reasonable, and JIDKDJOSJOFSD what else do I need to do, person.
-Galaxian-
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Today we're gonna laugh at Wiley going "ehHhhhHHhhhhh" while somehow altering pitch every 0.1 seconds and also him going "dISGuSTING" while making a face, ig.
-Galaxian-
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For some reason I feel like Wiley would like speedrunning games
He's good at most of them at least I think
He's somehow a pro at shooter games, when in reality he sucks at shooting
I would like to know why, actually.
-Galaxian-
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My mom refused to look at my drawing of Ambryll
Most satisfying moment of my day
-Galaxian-
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I told them to not eAT FAT, NOT EAT SO MUCH CHOLESTEROL, EAT 5-6 SMALL MEALS.
WHAT DO THEY GO OUT TO DO.
EAT 3 SMALL MEALS AND BUY CAKE FOR IN BETWEEN.
WHAT.
I--
NO.
Wiley's laughing at me for crying while making laughter-choking noises but in my defense, I rarely get a reference for despair noises
-Galaxian-
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Okay but an appreciable part of Wiley is I can make the worst jokes and he'll still laugh. Or snort. idk why he has so many variations of laughing but eh
My mom: You listened to this song yesterday iirc, why are you listening to it again
Me: Because it's my favorite song
My mom: Oh
Me, still doing math problems: And also because it sounds like despair (*snorts*)
Yeah idk but Wiley laughed at that so like. Thanks Wiley. lol
-Galaxian-
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I cut my nails yesterday (I cut them basically as short as I can cut them) and today...they're back to the length they were at before I cut them.
What the,,, heck???
Lol did I become a Scorpio Saint trainee
-Galaxian-
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Idk why a True Neutral guy would get concerned that I started looping a murdery-vibe song but to placate him (before he could call over Raez and Rai) I put on one of Raez's theme songs
I don't understand him lol
Why does he decide to let me get along with him on the day where my sanity is toppling like a Jenga tower
-Galaxian-
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Okay well this is kinda weird but Wiley left (he went to go ask Raez if he has a crush,,,) and somehow my anxiety feels alleviated
Wiley magic?? Anyways idk I'll need to thank him lol
-Galaxian-
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Roleplaying will still be delayed while I try to get stuff off of this computer and transfer back to my dear potato. Sorry about that, guys
-Galaxian-