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A few things.
For first, the primary concern of mine at the moment is trying to deal with a certain app my mom is using. So essentially she needs to get a legal document renewed from China, and the app, the primary way to renew it, is crap. (The other way, the only other way btw, is also crap. If you were wondering.) And I'm emailing the legal department of managing this stuff or whatnot on behalf of my mom (who needs to do other stuff) but the staff there can't English, don't want to Chinese, and have no intention of solving the technical issues they accidentally left unsolved (and are now purposefully letting left unsolved). Instead they apparently intend to let us try every non-solution that we've already tried (I told them everything we tried, they're just repeating stuff back to us. I tried every one of those things for the past month and more) as well as the one solution we haven't tried, which is...getting a new device. Look, I'm not getting even a new apple (fruit) for a legal document, not to mention an Apple (TM) phone or iPad that costs more than a drawing tablet. See, I'm not even getting the drawing tablet; it's not necessary and too expensive. So no, I'm not wasting money to circumvent an issue you leave unfixed, inconvenient legal department.
Anyways, ranting aside, to summarize, it's very inconvenient, and thank the gods we're renewing the legal document before we'd have to use it. A hypothetical timeline where we had to travel super quickly back to China for an emergency and this entire mess was here...would probably make both my mom and I have breakdowns every day, lol. Probably mental breakdowns for my mom every day, and then mental breakdowns for me after night after she goes to bed, since that's also how stress in general works in our household.
And also, if my mom were an orphan or were truly estranged from everyone in China, then we would be triple screwed. We would be so screwed that we wouldn't be screwed in the way we are now. Tbh imagining it right now is kind of hilarious, but when you're working on trying to get someone to solve the issues they overlooked for who-knows-which time-it-is this year, it's more annoying than funny.
Anyhow, it's not like I don't have free time right now, but most of my awake time atm is spent on this issue. I technically can draw and write, and I am, it's just that I'm not showing it out of lack of confidence in my work.
And then the other thing. F/GO is something I am kinda losing passion for. I guess it'd be okay normally, but right now I feel like I'm being forced to play because of the event. Mostly I'm frustrated that the event is so long and that I probably can't finish it. Technically my mom would be willing to let me play a lot of the time, since I'm on break, but she needs her time off (on the computer) as well as the means to do work via technology, so there's no way I can be selfish like that. Not to mention, F/GO wastes a lot of time with its loading and all that. And also, my mom doesn't like games, no matter how she's trying to be more flexible with my playing one, and I don't want to make her stress and distress worse with my actions.
I think about F/GO a lot--and the designs, story, background, connected series and such--but right now, gameplay is less than fun most of the time. Kinda sucks. But, well, after school starts, after the 18th to be precise, the event will be over and I'll be able to hopefully tune down the need for gameplay and start finding it fun again.
-Galaxian-
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Don't tell her I said this, but Mom's mentality has been pretty bad as of late.
I mean, she admitted it, but it's worse than she says. I don't think she realizes.
The good thing is that it's better than when she was in...heck...in January or so, dealing with bullying and discrimination.
The bad thing is that the good thing isn't all that good. It's pretty neutral, if you think about it.
Really, the bullying and discrimination kind of got to her, and not just from that one event. I don't know what to do. I know she's not perfect, and I say so a lot (I honestly hate myself for this; why can't I just be positive and supportive to her?), but I've never blamed her for how she works/thinks or doubted her abilities.
My mom's the most unlucky person I know, that's for sure--as in those I know personally. She's kept going, and that's an inspiration, but she could be going on a lot better. The problem for me is I don't know how to help her do that--to help her "go on a lot better." It feels a lot more like I'm a liability to various degrees most of these days.
Honestly, I think I get my anxiety and ways of panicking from Mom. Not that I'd say this to her, haha. I don't think it's a compliment or anything close to one.
Anyways, Mom gets unhappy? I get dragged down too. I'm not complaining; it's just the way it is. And if it weren't this way, I'd probably be too dense and not notice for a few days.
I hope school gives me a little break this year, so I don't get wound up ridiculously and end up influencing Mom and my friends.
And I really need to learn to leave when I become a problem in that sort of way. Maybe (get some sunscreen on and) run outside for a bit. Or something like that. Or at least I could try to apologize. But I don't, and so there are still many, many reasons why I say with certainty that I'm not a very good person at all.
On the school thing, though, I warned my mom a few days back about anxiety coming with school and she laughed and said, "That's mostly because of your perfectionism," and I felt pointed out in the way of being punched in the gut or something.
I honestly did not think she'd make a link so quickly, lol.
I guess my knowledge that she is the one who understands me more than anyone other than myself isn't for naught.
-Galaxian-
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You know when you're trying to read a digital book but the first pages aren't loading so you click to a random place in the book and somehow you managed to skip to that one inappropriate scene
I'm scarred, honestly
Is this luck or misfortune? Because on one hand I'm scarred, like I said, but on the other hand now I can at least drop the book without starting it, which would be much easier than getting to the section by reading through to it and getting scarred and having to drop it
Honestly what the heck? This was a young adult novel in the kids section of the library,,, bruh.
-Galaxian-
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Here the air quality is really bad atm, because of wildfires. Most of these days with bad air quality, it's been because of ground-level ozone. But yeah, I think we're only starting wildfire season? It's only going to get worse from here and I honestly don't know why anyone is surprised at this point.
Anyways, yeah, so we can't open windows.
I fell asleep at 7 in the morning today, but woke up at the usual time. Oof.
Sorry for the weird reply here, I'm stuck on this tab and need to close it.
-Galaxian-
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Watched a video where the narrator of it calls geese "ducks" for the entirety of the video
-Galaxian-
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Good to know that 8 hours of sleep is really not enough
Though maybe the fact that I woke up 3 hours after falling asleep and then continued to wake up sporadically due to overheating and sweating probably didn't help.
Well at least now the planet is clearly letting even developed countries know that we have messed up
Wonder if enough of us will listen (((((:
-Galaxian-
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Lol Ushi pwning enemies with only 20K health left with 400K NPs
-Galaxian-
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I have teeth growing in and it hurts fjsidfjsdosj
-Galaxian-
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Rn I can ascend both Passionlip and Robin Hood and seeing the two of them side by side is not giving me good vibes
I want to punt my Robin Hood onto the Moon
Anyways I ascended Passionlip (:
OwO pretty final ascension art that I didn't spoil myself for :D
-Galaxian-
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Did I ever mention that I ascended Bedivere to his final ascension too
Altera's stuck there though. At level 78 iirc.
And one of Kid Gil's skills is at level 8, the highest of anyone's skills other than Mash iirc (Mash's skills are 10-10-9)
-Galaxian-
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Dude that's cool :0 I'm sure Bedi's grateful
Kid Gil deserves high skill levels owo
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One day I'll do a Chaldea tour xD
It's kinda chaotic here lol
Bruh I need Void Dust again for skills. Phoenix feathers too. Why, Sabers xD
-Galaxian-
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SpecterTheGreat wrote:
Dude that's cool :0 I'm sure Bedi's grateful
Kid Gil deserves high skill levels owo
Well I can say he has a very nice smile lol
Lol Level 8 Charisma
-Galaxian-
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150K damage from Bedi's NP :0
Unfortunately it's only with an event CE but not shabby owo
(Usually it's like 120K damage with buffs iirc)
-Galaxian-
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Tbh sometimes I feel like the F/GO community forgets that lore exists
I get the feeling when they complain about "lackluster Passives" like bruh not every hero from every myth/history event has Riding EX xD
-Galaxian-
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I like how as soon as I ascend her I get betrayed
-Galaxian-
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Emperor penguins: (*in the background of a F/GO fight*)
Specter probably: Aw, cute
Me: Did you know that if humans continue on in their stupidity, these are going extinct by 2100?
(Okay a part of me thought it was cute too)
-Galaxian-
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Those penguins are too cute tbh I got distracted from the battle just cause they're there xD
Save the penguins
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To be honest, I was so focused on getting the fight done that I didn't notice them until the Battle Finish screen lol I caught the first one as it jumped into the pool
Also tbh is it even cold enough for emperor penguins there?? I'm slightly concerned.
-Galaxian-
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Obviously not of my creation
-Galaxian-
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Learned more about how the 4 Most Handsome Ancient Chinese Men died
Panyue (more popularly known as Panan): Allegedly was involved in a rebellion against the imperial family, so he died, along with 2 other generations of his family.
Weijie: Had a weak body. Popular accounts are he either died from pulling an all-nighter from talking about stuff with someone or he died from having too many fans. Talk about being unfit for being an idol lol
Jikang: Bastard from what I can tell. Didn't die horribly though.
Gao Changgong: Fought for his country, served under a horrible petty emperor, was gifted a vial of poison and drank it to his death
The 4 Ancient Chinese Beauties (as in most beautiful women) also had pretty horrible lives though (: arguably worse just because they were women and sexism was (and is) very real
Iirc they're Yang Guifei, Diaochan, Wang Zhaojun, and Xishi.
I have particular sympathy for Diaochan because she was 16 (I think?) and had to serve in her foster father's (iirc he was a foster father?) schemes. In the process she had to have an affair with one of the most disgusting men in the Three Kingdoms period, Dongzuo. And of course she probably died afterward. I hope she just faded into obscurity or something but Ancient China during the Three Kingdoms was pretty un-peaceful, as anyone who knows the period will know
Xishi was drowned by a king. He'd used her and then killed her out of "fears that he would also fall victim to his beauty." We love men pawning off blame to women since ancient times. Anyways he drowned her by trapping her in a bag and throwing her into a river. Or she committed suicide. The second option is honestly slightly preferred but both are pretty terrible options.
Wang Zhaojun (Wangqiang) was sent for an arranged marriage between kingdoms (technically), and died of illness. Actually the best death in comparison to the others iirc.
And Yang Guifei (Yang Yuhuan)...well, I don't really like her, but I also don't really hate her. I guess she was stupid, but maybe she was uneducated. Anyways, the emperor focused on her for a long time, but eventually upon being confronted for his inaptitude, Yang Yuhuan was the one who paid for his inability. He ordered her to be killed, basically. Reluctantly or not, it was pathetic.
-Galaxian-
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I've known Columbus from F/GO for one cutscene and already I hate him (:
-Galaxian-
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Kotomine
is sweet and all, but this man is always sus as heck and I don't trust him for some reasongambling to save up for Halloween and Christmas gifts for Chaldea's kiddo Servants
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Sussir
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-Galaxian-Ah yes I thought Semiramis would be here.
The shipping part of my mind is going at it again, only because she called him a fool?
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"Sussy baka" jumped into my mind as soon as I made that post.
Oh my gods. :/ Bruh.
-Galaxian-
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I keep forgetting to say this, but good luck to everyone resuming public schooling! :D Hope you have a great school year!
-Galaxian-
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GalaxianExplosion wrote:
"Sussy baka" jumped into my mind as soon as I made that post.
Oh my gods. :/ Bruh.
-Galaxian-
Quit being a sussy baka, Galaxian
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You're welcome
-Galaxian-
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CYXY3000H finished.
I don't really know what to say
I am very tempted to write fanfiction, I guess; if nothing else it's to confirm that I like my own theories much more than canon, actually because they're better in nature and not just happier or whatever.
I might try
Right now the venom that is the ship of Alexander x Li is cursing me and I honestly just wanna focus on something that will make it go away somehow
Listen, if my theories were correct, Alexander x Li might actually be fine. Finer than it already is anyways, it can't get much worse. Maybe it'd be worse if they were blood-related ig (HELLO CURSED SS SHIPS) but imo it's already horrible enough already
-Galaxian-