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Wiley: If you put a slice of turkey onto a CD player and press play, will it play the turkey's whole life story?
Adrik: none of the information I have been programmed with has prepared me for this question
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Wiley: What do you call a hot gay person?
Wiley: LGBBQ
Raez: it's 3 A.M. Go to sleep.
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Wiley, bleeding from a cut: Help! I'm covered with flesh juice!
Raez: You're covered in what?
Wiley: Flesh juice!
Raez, turning away: Go get your own band-aid.
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Raez: (*staring off into space with a pained expression*)
Rai: (*waves his hand in front of the other's face*) Dude, you okay?
(Meanwhile, for the seventh time that morning)
Wiley: sAY IT AIN'T SO, I WILL NOT GO, TURN THE LIGHTS OFF, CARRY ME HOME, NA NA NA NA NA NA NA--
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(Middle school possibly)
Raez, trying to bond: So, Wiley, what are your goals in life
Wiley: I've been banned from every major city's public transportation system except Melbourne, Australia. I don't know what their limit is but I WILL freaking find it
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Wait if Calix is in his mid thirties, wouldn't that mean he possibly was a teacher for the current new teachers? Because I planned the idea of that he took a break from teaching before coming back to only be a couple of years iirc, so like
Calif possibly taught the new teachers for a couple years??? In history classes??? Lmao he's also more strict than the rest of the teachers too, I wonder what the opinions of his teaching would be
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Hitan's basically student age, so it might be possible that Calix was one of his teachers. Iollan likely didn't actually attend Hope's Peak though, so that's a no for him
I'm not actually sure if Hitan's talent was actually a new/updated one (like he had an old one) come to think of it
-Galaxian-
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Wait, what was Hitan's talent?
Last edited by Echo (February 19, 2021 00:23:08)
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Formerly it was the Ultimate Professor before he actually became a teacher, but for some reason I feel like a freshman in high school (or someone around that age) probably wouldn't be shouldering that in the first year
-Galaxian-
Edit, June 2022: yeah idk anymore
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Geez that would be a pretty extreme talent lol
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Hwbfjwnfn that also reminds me that almost everyone in the class is around 14-15 except Adrik (around a few months old lol) and possibly Silence (Age: ?????)
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I feel like 15-16 is a better estimate tbch (that stands for "to be completely honest;" that isn't a mix-up of the word meaning female dog lol I swear)
-Galaxian-
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*squints at tbch* did he call me a-
Ope yea that would make more sense
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(Texting)
Raez: "Wiley"
Raez: "WILEY"
Raez: "WILEYYYY"
Raez: "Someone at school just died"
Raez: "YOUR SCIENCE LAB IS ABOUT TO EXPLODE AND RAI'S NOT HERE"
Raez: "I brought donuts to your lab"
Wiley: "i'll be there in 10 min"
Wiley: "if the donuts aren't there i *will* be pissed"
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Raez: "Wiley did you do something to my phone??"
Raez: "Every time I type 'butt' it changes it to 'butt'"
Wiley: "weird. what does it change it to?"
Raez: "butt"
Wiley: "try typing the original word again"
Raez: "butt"
Wiley: "This is great"
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Raez: "The road was icy this morning, if u drive then be careful while doing it"
Rai: "OK, thanks, man"
Raez: "YOLO"
Rai: "that's not usually used as a warning"
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Raez: "Wait, you can text with your voice?"
Rai: "Yeah. It's called voice to text"
Raez: "This space is space amazing! Space I space am space going space to space text space you space all space the space time space now! Send text send message send now"
Raez: "Crap"
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Wiley's mom to Wiley: "I'm leaving for the weekend so I hid $50 in the house somewhere for food, clean the entire house and you'll find it at some point...probably ;)"
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Fun fact, the only parent-teacher committee meeting Wiley's mom ever attended was when he was still in the elementary grades--1st grade to be precise.
She was appalled that the classwork/curriculum didn't involve solving global warming and other useful stuff so she made him transfer schools
It was a mandatory meeting.
-Galaxian-
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Leila, to Martin: "Where are you?"
Leila: "There's a boy here, he says he knows Shouhei and Rai"
Leila: "He's really strange"
Leila: "I gave him Nutella"
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Wiley, on Mother's Day: "love u mom, thx for being amazing always"
Wiley's mom: "Are you in trouble??? Is this code???"
Wiley: "no i'm fine"
Wiley's mom: "Prove that you're you and not a kidnapper"
Wiley's mom: "What's my real hair color?"
Wiley: "no idea, literally have never seen it"
Wiley's mom: "Ok lol, love you too"
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Silence: "My gender is anger and my pronouns are frick off and screw you!"
Malaika: I just moved in across the hall and I think it would be nice for us to meet!"
Sunny: "And why would that be nice?!"
Adrik, genuinely trying to study humans: "Why are you like this?"
Silence: "I used too much 'no more tears' shampoo as a child and I haven't felt a single emotion since then."
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(Wiley as a Toddler Chronicles)
Wiley's mom: Currently helping my son search for his chocolate that I ate last night
Wiley's mom: My kid threatened to hold his breath until I gave him dessert. He's now passed out on the floor. I don't negotiate with terrorists
Wiley: Can I have some of your candy?
Wiley's mom: I got this for Mother's Day
Wiley: You're only a mom 'cause of me. Give
Wiley's mom: My son's superpower is to able to turn 1 cracker into 10 kilograms of crumbs
Wiley's mom: Just taught Wiley about taxes by eating half of his ice cream
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Wiley: Dude
Raez: Yeah?
Wiley: I got a bird
Raez: Nice, what's its name?
Wiley: Lunch
Raez:
Raez: What??? Why Lunch?
Wiley: So I can say, "Hold on guys I'm gonna go get lunch" and when I come back everyone will be expecting lunch but it'll be a screechy bird
Raez: I wonder how we became friends sometimes
Wiley: You love me so shut up
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Raez: "Did you get your phone back?"
Wiley: "no i'm texting back with the microwave"
Raez: "DUDE! Cool, you gotta show me how to do that"
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Hitan: Life gives us each a gift.
Galaxian: I got the gift of intelligence!
Francis: I got the gift of artistic talent!
Alma: I got the gift of dashing good looks!
Sunny: I have crippling depression.
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Shouhei: (*doing laundry*) Brother, I don't want you to hang around Wiley so much
Rai: Why not?
Shouhei: I just get a weird--
Wiley, from inside the washing machine: Yeah, why not?
Shouhei, screaming:
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Rai: I'm getting a call from my father
Wiley: I'll act natural
Rai: You're not going to be on the phone call. (*answers phone*) Hey Dad, wassup
Wiley, shouting next to the phone: MY MY, WHAT DELICIOUS WATER I AM DRINKING!
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Headcanon that the first time Wiley met Specter he thought "Ultimate Medium" means, like, they're not too short and not too tall
He still calls them "Average Height Ghost Person"
-Galaxian-
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Malaika: Could you give me a napkin~?
Raez: What's the magic word?
Malaika: (*starts chanting in Latin*)
Raez, panicking: JUST TAKE IT OH MY GOD