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Kiaane, acting as a GPS: Take the next exit and bear right
Ryoo, from the backseat: What’s Mother doing?
Aereon, sitting shotgun: I’m changing this infernal music; I can’t stand it anymore.
Elio, driving: I swear if you put the soundtrack to Frozen again I’m going to kick you out of the car
Ignas: Next time, I’m taking riding a bike.
Martin, in the trunk: Guys, please can we stop, I needed to go to the restroom twenty miles back
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This is too accurate I'm rofl
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I imagine this happening in the past~
August: Why don't astronauts go to the sun at night?
Sollux: Because it would be too dark. Plus, the sun would be sleeping, and he wouldn't be able to greet the guests.
Kenyon: Are you being serious--
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(Sunny is very "smh" rn)
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Raez: *locks Dion in the car* Act like a child, get treated like a child.
Dion, banging on the window:What, isn't it illegal to lock a child in a car!?!?
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Sollux: Can you be quiet!? I'm trying to think.
Sunny: Of course. Doing anything for the first time is always difficult.
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*Watchig a horror movie*
Wiley: Are you scared?
Rai: In this economy who wouldn't be.
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Ishmael: Maybe this post won't be important for the majority of people here. Some of you will ignore it, some of you won't bother to read ir and it will be ignored like some other posts here. Maybe I will be criticized by this but I just wanted to let you know that I'm selling potatoes.
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Potatoes? I would like some.
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(In an argument)
Sollux: You are selfish!
Sunny: That is true!
Sollux: And a jerk who only cares about himself!
Sunny: That is also true!
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Sunny: Mosquitoes are like your family.
Sunny: Hecking annoying, but they have your blood.
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I'm dying so much!!!
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Sollux, making a sale: Normally, I take a five percent commission, but I’ll lower it to three. Friends and family discount.
Sunny: Make it five. I don’t want you getting any ideas about us being friends or family.
Sollux: Respect.
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Garakuta: Who decided dragons need arms? They don’t need arms.
Hitan: They need arms to hug.
Garakuta: …oh, you’re right again.
Hitan: Last week, Helen was supposed to buy gas, but instead bought novelty cookie cutters. Now everything we eat is shaped like a dinosaur.
Hitan: She's amazing.
Raez, knocking on the door: Are you decent?
Wiley: Morally no, but I’m wearing clothes if that’s what you’re asking.
Raez: Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is alive. I don't need words, just a response of any sort. Ok, hope you're living.
Wiley: [deathlike zombie noises]
Raez: This is sufficient.
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Literally everyone in Groupe Akame: Oh, so when other people go outside it's "good for their health" and "highly recommended", it's only when I do it that it's a "containment breach" and a "high-level threat to public safety and security", huh?
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Germaine: Pick your battles. Pick... pick fewer battles than that. No, put some battles back, that's too many.
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Wiley: Well, my head says no, but my heart says—
Raez: Your heart shouldn’t have an opinion.
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Wiley: (*cuts off the sleeves to his lab coat*)
Rai: ,,, why are you doing that
Wiley: Raez is gone and he's like 95% of my impulse control
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What in the world, Wiley.
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Sunny: When people get too chummy with me, I like to call them by the wrong name to let them know I don’t really care about them.
Sollux: That’s a genius move.
Sunny: Thank you.
Sollux: You’re welcome, Lester.
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Helen, just wanting to text Hitan while he's at work: "Hi~"
Hitan, interpreting "Hi~" as a cut-off version of his name and panicking: "Who do I need to kill?"
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I'd tell him to relax a little but I don't think it would be a good idea.
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Rai: What's your name, sir?
Wiley: Tobi
Rai: Tobi...full name?
Wiley: Tobi or not to be
Rai:
Akuma: Don't judge me because I'm quiet.
Akuma: No one plans a murder out loud :').
Yvonne: Sleep is for the weak!
Yvonne: And I am...I am very weak.
Someone: Why do you read stories? People in there don't exist.
Sunny: Why do you breathe? You'll die anyways
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bruhh
I'm just... bruh momentuming
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Bruhh is right though xD
-Galaxian-
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Sunny: Don’t be ashamed of who you are.
Sunny: That’s your parents’ jobs.
Raez: Where are you going, Wiles?
Wiley: Well, that depends, Raez. When I die? Probably Hell. But right now, I am going to the restroom.
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Akuma: Count to 10 if you want your family back
Hitan: 1 3 5 7--
Akuma: But what about the even numbers--
Hitan: I CAN'T EVEN--
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Raez: I don't need therapy. I have you guys!
Rai: We're just as messed up as you are. It's like the blind leading the blind.
Raez, to Wiley: Come and look in the mirror. See? There's a beautiful, aspiring young man with a plentiful potential. Oh look, and you're here too.
Raez: I bet you’re wondering why I called you here today.
Raez: It’s because we need to have a discussion about how some people in this room aren’t getting along with other people in this room.
Dion: Why are you being so vague? Wiley and I are the only ones here.
Akuma: You say 'kidnapping', I say 'surprise adoption'.
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Galaxian: All entities can be forgiven.
Dust, to the Masked Ones: My plans involve us going to kidnap or murder a baby deity to traumatize her mother.
Galaxian: Most entities can be forgiven. :')
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Akuma: The snack that smiles back--
Akuma: CHILDREN
Galaxian: what the frick is wrong with you